Latest "Christmas" Posts

Christmas Parades – What A Ride

I trained for pageant competition at Billy's Funeral Home.Gracious, I had a blast riding in Christmas Parades! I became a skilled candy-thrower and I had perfected my beauty queen wave. But I learned more than just how to wave in parades. I believe these “rhinestoned lessons” taught me how to laugh at myself along with developing a healthy attitude while riding in a kazillion Christmas parades. Here are a few really funny, timeless lessons I learned.

  • Don’t take yourself too seriously.
    I was asked to be the Grand Marshall in a small town parade. Well, I thought I was the most important part of the parade until the Mayor told me that I was being replaced by the pride and joy of the town- a brand new, purple, sanitation truck. But the good news was I was allowed to ride in the front cab. It was a stitch! So there I sat, crown and all, as I rode through the elated town folks. They cheered and clapped… over their new, purple, dump truck. So much for me and my fabulous wave.

Posted in beauty queens, Christmas, Southern Humor by Jane Jenkins Herlong.

Why I Bought a Fake Christmas Tree

There comes a time when one eats the words of the infamous saying, “I will never, ever……” and adopt another saying, ”never say never…” The decision to buy a fake tree does not happen overnight. Most of the time is it a series of events leading up to the decision-making moment. Why I bought a fake Christmas tree started in back 1982.There comes a time when one eats the words of the infamous saying, “I will never, ever……” and adopt another saying, ”never say never…” The decision to buy a fake tree does not happen overnight. Most of the time is it a series of events leading up to the decision-making moment. Why I bought a fake Christmas tree started in back 1982.

Thomas and I were still “newlies” and renovated our home just enough to have interest in the Johnston Women’s Club Christmas Too-wah for those the non-Southerners (tour). The problem was that I had NO furniture. Enter Cuz Wayne the town decorator. He raped the homes of the Herlong women. It was an excellent idea until the tour-ees walked through my home saying, “Isn’t that Josie Herlong’s fainting couch that her Momma’s second cousin twice removed left her when the family sold their lovely home on Legare Street in the SOB section of down-town Charleston back when the war of Northern aggression was fixin’ to occur?”

Posted in Christmas, stress by Jane Jenkins Herlong.
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